Istanbul

Turkey.
The last leg of our tour.
A fantastic land full of colours, noise, food and mosques.

Mosques. Yup.
The Famous Ayasofya that looks like a mosque on the outside:
and also on the inside:
but when the mask is removed:
That is Jesus, man.

Ayasofya was built originally as a church and somewhere along the lines of war/revolution/reformation/renewal etc. the new Sultan decided to convert it into the mosque by sticking plaster over the tiled pictures of Christianity. Of course, a century later, the now government finds out that HEY! It's a church!! Let's take down part of the plasters to reveal the truth underneath, convert the place into a museum, charge 10 liras(= RM 28) for entry and stick it into all travel guides so that the whole world will come see it!!

Ingenious really.

So here I present you with the famous Ayasofya Mosque (or Church, can't quite make up my mind) and across from it, staring into its face is the great:- Blue Mosque.

the inside looking like:
Gazillions of ropes hanging from the ceilings to support the lights. Destroys the sight. Not understanding why they did that.

The Blue Mosque was built by Sultan Ahmed to rival Ayasofya because human beings can never be satisfied. And its label came from its blue top though really, the rest of the mosques in Turkey (about 1 cm away from each other) - also had blue tops.


3 different mosques from the Blue Mosque and they all look almost alike.

SO Original Right?! I like.

Of course, in every great empire, there is a palace to go to and we definitely did not miss out on the ultimate tourist experience of entering Topkapi Palace.
On entry, we had to pay up front another 10 lira. Miffed with the fact that I had to part with my already dwindling amount of cash, I was pleasantly surprised to find that the Palace was HUGE. As in not Forbidden City ENORMOUS but then Big Enough. Separate buildings for the library, the kitchen, the dining hall, etc. They even had gold plated arches that twinkled and shone in the bright sunlight.

Worth the 10 lira la. I think.

But of course, we had to pay another 10 lira to enter the Hamish, which is the bedroom of the Sultans and his wives. We stood about a second outside the counter, read up about it in Lonely Planet, observed the pictures in another guide book (that a friend got for 5 lira from a street peddlar), fidgeted about a little and did the ultimate Malaysian thing - decided not to go in. After all, why pay 10 bucks if we have already seen pictures of it in the book? I know. Kiamsiap right.

Aih. But really, it is just beds and toilets. I think we made the right choice.

The thing I found most unique was the Basilica Cistern.
An underground water system which was eerie, wet, dark and unearthly. 10 lira for entrance.

Damn, the country's an extortionist.

Pillars supporting walkways with fish swimming about in the gloomy waters below it... Perfect scene for a horror movie. I spent my first few minutes here awed with the sight and the next few running through all the movies I have watched thinking why was this never a spot for a Hollywood mega-hit and then finally came upon this signboard that said a James Bond movie was filmed here before. See, I am sure I was built for something bigger than medical school. Just waiting for Hollywood to come talent spot me as their next big director.

Other bits and pieces included walking miles to see this Aqueduct Valens deceivingly described as 'most people who sees it the first time is speechless with its magnificence and beauty'. The wonderfully scripted words made us walk half a day filled with images of 'magnificence' and 'beauty' only to be greeted with
The smiles are forced. I swear.

Cars, busy, dirty, smoky, noisy traffic travelling at 200mph is NOT my idea of magnificent nor beautiful. And this 'breathtaking' Aqueduct Valens is NOT worth the half day hike through Istanbul's dodgey streets where hum sup men leer at you, fruit sellers swing their wares in your face and on top if it all, constantly harbouring the fear of being a snatch theft victim. Not Impressed Whatsoever.

* * *

Now.
What is Turkey, if you didn't smoke some shisha, enjoy a luxurious Turkish Bath and watch the ever famous Belly Dancing??

Shisha we did:

bathing we did:
albeit in a rather awkward way as we were unsure of how much clothes to take off. Upon entering, we were allowed a 5 mins lie down on the warm marble raised platform in the middle of the hall before being vigorously scrubbed down by the er...I'll call them 'bath maids' that had huge upper halves swinging in plain view the whole time.

Nice Experience though. And Men are in a different section alright.

Belly Dancing...
we didn't.
Well the girls didn't.
Instead, the girls got talked into watching this wholesome experience of True turkish culture - oo la la, says the tourism officer.
Hmm, goes the girls, this is exciting, right we shall go for this turkish culture thing that might be different from belly dancing, cos, really, who hasn't seen some belly dancing before?

So 28 lira poorer, we entered into -

Hell.

Oh My Toot.

1 1/2 hours of pure torture.

Why? Because, we spent 45 minutes watching this guy sing:


Another 45 watching this 5 wackos swirl and twirl:



I mean, really. Don't bother watching.

Basically, in a language we did not understand, people twirling in the SAME ARRANGEMENT/DIRECTION/PATTERN and to put icing on the cake, I overheard some ang mor - obviously, say, "That was really amazing! They seemed to be in a trance. Same expressions. WOW."

I mean WOW. COME ON! I know its cultural and stuff, I even respect it fully - but it is not worth 28 bucks to see the same thing OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

Should have just paid the 35 euros to go watch what the guys saw:


Hmm. Nice.