ECG and Chest X Ray Intepretation

We shall have an incredibly fun time intepreting ECGs and chest X rays.

what is an ECG did u say??well, its an Extremely Complex Graph or electrocardiogram. take your pick. OoOooo .. I'm so excited!!!!

Well, to kick things off... this is a normal PQRS complex you should see. How easy is that?
Ok, assuming you have already got all of those in your head. the P-Q-R-S complex. oh with a T wave at the end... you should now be able to intepret the ECG below...
Well.... spot on! A sinus bradycardia.
I hear someone asking whats sinus... oh, sinus is when u have a P wave followed by the QRS complex and they are regular.
Bradycardia? Oh, that means a slow heart rate. Cause the distance between one R wave(highest peak) and the next =no of boxes. Heart rate = 300/no of boxes ie 300/6= 50. A normal heart rate is 60-100. anything below is bradycardia, anything above is tachycardia.

Oh shocker... you managed to spot an ST segment elevation!! He is having a myocardial infarction!!
Riight, i hear u say myo- infarc- what?? basically a heart attack. Medics have to sound high class. we call it a MYOCARDIAL INFARCTION.(basically so the normal population don't know it when doctors discuss it in front of them. Take neoplasia or metastases for example. It basically means cancer. Well, if we talk bout neoplasms and what not, the patients Wouldn't know they have cancer eventhough we are discussing it RIGHT IN FRONT OF 'EM. Doctors are compassionate people )
Hmm, is there a Q wave? It might be physiological or pathological. What on earth do they mean!?!??! Even both words are difficult to pronounce. Heck it.

Ok, I don't know what I'm talking about. Or what i heard in lecture today. Neither makes sense. I don't know how to read an ECG. and by the end of this year, i'm expected to be pretty damn good in it.

Never mind, considering that we are all geniuses at ECGs now, we'll move on to chest x-rays. Woohoo!
Have u seen anything like this? That is an absolutely normal chest x ray. YOUR chest should look just like it.
And this is..... a *copy n paste*

Pneumothorax - what the? i'm not very sure myself. Go to http://cancerweb.ncl.ac.uk/omd/index.html to find out yourself.

why pneumo-thingy?? because
.X-Ray signs:

1. Pleural line

2. No parenchym behind the line

3. Displacement of mediastinum


Huh? A few extra white lines and shapes here and there? Looks almost the same to the one above!

Argh, let's not even go there. I don't know anything of this.

I guess the only way is to bluff my way through med school.